Kerri Quinn

I was filled with fear and confusion. I am a reasonably smart woman with a strong will. I couldn't figure out how to stop. I'd make a promise every morning that today was the day... and fail. I sacrificed everything upon the alter of drugs and alcohol; my self worth, my passion, my honesty, my shine, jobs, relationships, promises.... all withered on that alter. My insides were rotting and my faith and will to continue were non existent. I was dying, but not fast enough for my liking. I had become a joke, a shadow, a shell.

I had made it to 5 PM at my bartending job three days after the love of my life walked out, and after drinking for the next two days. I want going to drink today. A stranger at the bar .. after seeing me refuse a customers offer to buy me a drink, gave me a meeting list for AA. God did for me what I wouldn't have done for myself in that moment, at that bar.

I'm sober and useful. I'm grateful. I'm inspired often. I experience joy, wonder, awe and love, I have also walked through dark and difficult times without falling. I stay connected. I like myself, and most days I love the woman I'm becoming. I'm accountable and responsible. I laugh freely and love deeply. I show up. I continue to seek, to question, to widen and deepen this life of mine. I am at ease, at peace and have purpose.