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      Sober Nation

      Putting Recovery On The Map

      07-19-16 | By

      8 Reasons Why People Are Afraid To Get Sober

      Are You Afraid of Getting Sober-

      It’s rare that anyone ever wants to get sober. Mostly, we are in a great amount of pain and change is our only option. Why is sobriety scary? That’s a loaded question. For me, I was terrified because I knew no other way to be. Alcohol was part of my identity and anything different seemed impossible. I didn’t want to admit that I might not have this drinking thing under control like I thought I did for so long. My life was a juggling act and alcohol was the boss. But it was hard for me to see that while I was in the thick of my addiction. Looking back, I know that all of my actions during that time were based on fear. It shouldn’t be surprising then that fear is why many people don’t get sober or take a long time to do so.

      Why people are afraid to get sober:

      1. They Think They’ll Hate It

      Fear of the unknown. Change can be painful and scary and many people truly believe they will dislike sobriety. I was one of those people. I thought being sober was lame and I couldn’t understand why anyone would want to do it. I was convinced I would hate it and that I would be miserable. That was before I knew anything about being sober. I think many people make this assumption before they even try sobriety.

      2. They are Afraid of Failure

      Getting sober is extremely daunting. It’s not surprising that many people are afraid of failure. I believe it’s part of the human condition to fear failing at anything. Fear of relapse can keep us drinking for a long time. But the truth is, making mistakes is part of the human condition as well. We are all flawed and it’s not realistic to think we will be perfect, even at sobriety. You can’t fail at sobriety, you can only keep trying and keep growing.

      3. They are Afraid Life Will Be Boring

      I was one of the people who actually felt bad for sober people. I thought their lives were boring, routine, and unexciting. Alcoholism had me 100 percent convinced that life was not fun without the presence of alcohol. Wow, how wrong I was! I am not the only one who feels the way I felt. No one wants to have a boring life. Until we smash these common misconceptions about sobriety, people will continue to think sobriety is boring.

      4. They Don’t Know Who They are Without Alcohol

      Like I mentioned earlier, alcohol was part of my identity. I didn’t realize how deeply embedded it was until I got sober. When alcohol becomes an integral part of your life, it’s scary to think about who you are without it. Will you still be fun? Will you still be popular and able to make jokes? There are a lot of unknown answers and some people do not want to know themselves without this toxic substance.

      5. They’re Afraid of the Pain

      Pain is what we’ve always tried to avoid by drinking and drugging. Feeling pain is not ideal for those of us who are in active addiction and part of sobriety is feeling everything, even the pain. This can scare people to the core, but pain can be worked through. It is a part of life and if you numb your feelings all the time, you won’t feel the good or the bad. Fear of pain keeps people drinking for far too long.

      6. They are in Denial About Their Problem

      This was also me. I had myself convinced that my drinking was just like everyone else’s and therefore I didn’t have a problem. I surrounded myself with people that drank and used just like I did. I truly thought I was just the fun party girl who only socialized and drank alcohol. I thought just because I didn’t drink in the morning and at times would go a few days without booze, that alcohol was a non-issue for me. This prevented me from being able to see that I had a dangerous relationship with booze. I did not want to admit to a drinking problem and that kept me drinking.

      7. They Don’t Want to be Different

      It’s hard out there for a sober person. I won’t lie, being sober in a world full of drinkers is different and sometimes difficult. It’s easy to feel like the media and society promote drinking because they do. That’s why I believe it’s a heroic act to be sober in today’s world. Many people do not like the idea of being “different.” The idea of being a non-drinker is something every sober person must accept and many who are afraid cannot.

      8. They Don’t Think it’s For Them

      It wasn’t until well into my sobriety that I thought, “this is for me.” During my first year of sobriety it was just something I was doing, not drinking. I wasn’t sure where I was going with it, if I would stay sober forever, or even if I was an actual alcoholic. Sobriety is often tied to the extreme stereotype of addiction, the old homeless man that lives under the bridge, the heroin addict who shoots up in the bathroom. Sobriety is not considered for people who black out every once in awhile, or just booze at social events, but the reality is sobriety is possible for everyone. I feel like a lot of people fear they will like sobriety and then will have to deal with the repercussions of telling everyone in their life they no longer drink.

      Yes, it’s true, the idea of getting sober is scary. Fear is the motivator of most actions taken by anyone in active addiction. But sometimes the juggling act gets old, the attempt at moderation becomes exhausting, and we just can’t keep all the lies straight. You might have these common fears about getting sober, but the benefits greatly outweigh the risks.

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