What it was like?

It started out fun and cute but my God, once that monkey was on my back...I couldn't get him off! Jails, institutions and near-death experiences all are a part of my journey. The brokenness and lost of self was at an all time high and a way up and out just seemed impossible at times. My allergy to drugs and alcohol became unbearable. Relapse after relapse...try after try...program after program...failure after failure became my mantra.

What happened?

I FOUGHT! I LOST! I S U R R E N D E R E D!!!

What it is like now?

TODAY...let's just say...I WON'T COMPLAIN!! I've had some good days, I've had some hills to climb and some sleepless nights but when I look around and think things over, any day clean, good or bad, is better than any of my using days. I make an effort to surrender on a daily basis. I made a commitment to self and I made a covenant with my Higher Power.