Sober Since: 05 / 25 / 2009
Sober For: 10 Years & 242 Days
What it was like?
It was lonely, with temporary happiness and a world full of shame, insecure about myself and what others thought of me, and grief. Uncertainty surrounding me all the time.
I didn't start out as a heavy drinker of course like all of us, but when the abuse started to happen and my suspicion of my ex having affairs I began to binge drink. I used to laugh and say, drunk, sober, drunk, sober. It wasn't funny but I guess that's how I dealt with it. When my marriage ended the drinking did not. I met a man who today is my best friend and husband of 3 years. Together we have a blended family with 4 adult kids. I have a son and daughter and he has 2 daughters. We went through 3 years of my husband trying to understand and finally all of them said this is it. Either the booze or us. It was a decision that was not hard to make. Losing my family was NOT an option. My blackouts, drunk rages and hurt had to stop. It's been 7 years since I made the best decision of my life.
What it is like now?
Now, well, it is amazing. I love being sober and in control of my thoughts and my life. I have respect from so many people I thought would be judgemental and look down on me because, oh my, she's an alcoholic! No, I am a recovering alcoholic. The amount of people that praise you when you tell them you've been sober is so rewarding. I love my life, my family and myself.