Sober Since: 12 / 04 / 2016
Sober For: 5 Years & 168 Days
What it was like?
It was misery! Looking back at it all, it started when I began to fall in love with my best friend. I was not out as gay to hardly anyone. I thought he was gay, but he wound up being straight. He stole alcohol, so we basically had an endless supply. I worked, he did not. That combination gave birth to my disease. The prime of my drinking days lasted a solid 2 years. Coincidentally, those were the 2 years that I was out of school. I took these 2 years off after my first 2 years of college. This was June 2010 - May 2012. The first of these years, I wound up getting 2 DUI charges. I showed up hungover/still drunk to my job. It was a driving job, so that was bad. I smoked cigarettes and dipped chewing tobacco to even myself out. We wound up being evicted from 2 different apartments in that first year. There was also an abundance of drugs in that apartment. I was also doing ecstasy every weekend for about 6 months, and percocet was also being done in the house. But my poison was in the bottle. I was constantly stealing booze and at one time living out of my car, which I managed to keep for not even two years.. a brand new car.. how disappointing.
The second year we moved out of Arizona and into Colorado. The problems continued. I lost a couple jobs and was one of the drunks of the town. I went to the hospital 5 times during my drinking and drugging career, and also had 2 shoplifting charges under my belt. I was the first one in line at the liquor store. I was drinking to fight off withdrawl symptoms. I could not get sober! I broke phones and woke up in a creek one time, as well as a holding cell with a cast on my right hand due to broken glass. I wound up in one hospital due to mixing beer and cocaine. I wound up scrambing around Colorado and eventually had to call my parents to get me, because I simply could not do it anymore. I wound up going to rehab in Oklahoma. 31 days in rehab, then I was out.. I wound up finding the bottle again. I sobered up eventually and wound up getting back in school. Now the alcoholic was back in college. I never had these problems in school before, but things were different now. I wound up going to class and work drunk often, and had to drop a couple classes due to failing efforts. I changed my major and had a new start, but that didn't help. One of my lows was failing a class and getting written up at work due to my poor performance, due to being hungover/drunk. It was embarrassing. My boss knew, but he also knew the good in me and believed in me. From there on, I turned it around a little. I had a string of 7 months sober, which is still my record. I was going to the gym so much, and it was a lot better. I still relapsed every few months or so, but it was never as bad as it was.
What it is like now?
I wound up graduating college, which is my 2nd biggest accomplishment, after getting sober. I am currently on a 3.5 month stretch, and it feels so much better. I also ran from my legal issues (DUI's) for over 5 years. They are currently being taken care of. I still have not driven in over 5 years, but I am getting my license and car back in June. Even on days that I don't feel great, at least I'm sober. I am so happy to still be alive and free (ish - I'm on house arrest lol). But not in prison for killing somebody while drunk driving, including myself. I could easily be dead - from numerous occurrences. I am strong in my sobriety now, and am never looking back =)