What it was like?

I was four years sober and doing well. I had just finished college, got engaged, and got a job working in recovery. In 2018 I took a turn for the worst after I lost my grandma on 4/17/2018 and just five months later I left my fiancé due to Irreconcilable Differences. I coped with the losses for about a month before I fell apart. I started associating with my old crowd again and ended up in the bar in November 2018. Today I am 50 days sober after endless nights of blackouts and losing everything I worked so hard for. I almost ended up in jail several times, I let people take advantage of me, and I lost very prestigious careers.

What happened?

I was four years sober and doing well. I had just finished college, got engaged, and got a job working in recovery. In 2018 I took a turn for the worst after I lost my grandma on 4/17/2018 and just five months later I left my fiancé due to Irreconcilable Differences. I coped with the losses for about a month before I fell apart. I started associating with my old crowd again and ended up in the bar in November 2018. Today I am 50 days sober after endless nights of blackouts and losing everything I worked so hard for. I almost ended up in jail several times, I let people take advantage of me, and I lost very prestigious careers. I had two turning points. The first one being that I got involved with a guy that used me for a few months until he landed his eye on a new girl and she beat me up while he watched and allowed it to happen. I was more hurt that he allowed it to happen than the physical damage. The second being that I was fired from my 911 job that I loved so much because I partied the night before and didn’t make it in on time the next morning.

What it is like now?

Since I’ve been sober I have been fighting battles and trying to rebuild what I’ve lost. I currently work in a Domestic Violence shelter and I’m taking one day at a time. I’m so happy I’m not where I was just a few months ago.

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