Sober Since: 10 / 05 / 2015
Sober For: 7 Years & 59 Days
What it was like?
Fun at first. Then it went to pure hell. Couldn't hold a job, relationship, and became completely isolated. Consumed by craving, obsession, and hating myself for it all.
I was between homeless and staying with my dealer. The drink and the drugs were always around. Unlimited access to both. I used and drank to drown out the pain I was feeling about where my life had sank to. I constantly prayed for death; to not live this way. One day the request to not live like this was answered. I woke up to feeling a peace I had never known. Sleeping on garbage and a house full of mice I knew I was done. I borrowed my dealers car with no plan on how I would get it back to him I scrambled to find a rehab I could get into. I had to wait a couple days, which was a blessing because I could line up a ride and the rest is history.
What it is like now?
It's a miracle to be here and I treat it as such. I give thanks daily. Try to stay humble and grateful for this second chance on life I have been given. (Progress, not perfection. Lol.) I am not ashamed of what I went through anymore. I believe I had to in order to get where I'm at. I am a father, a husband, son, and brother, and for the first time I feel like I am truly all of those. #wedorecover