4 Things Sober People Do That Most People Don't

I have such respect for people in recovery. It takes a great deal of discipline and sacrifice to do the things necessary to stay sober a day at a time. Granted, sobriety is not a cookie-cutter scenario. Everyone has a different journey and a different personality so there are always idiosyncrasies involved with everyone's unique recovery program. Through all of our differences, I have observed certain character traits that exist in most people in recovery. These character traits may be there from birth, or maybe they have evolved. Let's get started!

1 - They Self-Reflect

They have to. For addicts and alcoholics, the drink or the drug is always calling to them. Maybe the obsession has been lifted, but there is always that little voice in the back of our minds that is telling us "maybe one day." If we stop self-reflecting and stop taking an evaluation of ourselves, we slowly start to slip back into our old ways. You have to understand yourself in order to fully grasp why it was that you drank or drugged in the first place. It is critical. People in recovery are always trying to do a little better than they did yesterday. People in recovery are always striving to make progress. I find that once people get a taste of the good life recovery gives them, they try to apply it in all aspects of their lives. Self reflection will help improve your life in...

• Your career.
• Your relationships.
• Your health.
• Your spiritual life.
• Your mental health and outlook.
• Your time management.

I am by no means claiming that people in recovery are better than or smarter than anyone else, I am simply saying that we do a good job at self-evaluating and finding ways to improve.

2 - They Are Honest With Themselves

Let's just announce the elephant in the room. Getting sober does not mean you are instantly a better person or that you will stop lying.  I have seen (as I'm sure you have as well) many people who are sober but still live dirty lives. I'm not judging. Everyone is free to make their own mistakes. I am however implying that the majority of people in recovery have a good capacity to be honest with themselves. It is very difficult to remain sober if you are not. RELATED: 5 Reasons You'll Never Get Sober.  It is so difficult to lie to yourself. Somehow the truth always finds a way to bring itself to the surface. Denial is so rampant in our society. People are in denial about their weight, about their achievements, their potential, you name it. People are in denial about so much in their lives, and I am grateful that sobriety taught me the value of being honest with myself. The truth is like a splinter. It sits underneath the skin. If you deny it, that doesn't mean it's not there. The longer you ignore or deny the truth, the worse the pain gets. The truth nags at you and only gets worse and worse the longer you go without dealing with it. Eventually, a tiny little splinter will become so painful that you are forced to deal with it. Same goes with the truth. Most people in recovery can deal with the truth and be upfront about the discomfort of it. We have learned in the beginning stages of our recovery that dealing with the pain of the truth is easier to manage before it becomes a catastrophe. The truth is like a splinter. It's coming out one way or another. The only question is how bad do you want it to hurt?

3 -  They Help Others

There is a reason for this. I believe that service, although selfless, does have some selfish motives behind it. I also think this is perfectly okay. Almost every drug addict will tell you about their busy minds. Speaking for myself, I can tell you that it's exhausting. It never stops. I just can't stop thinking. Am I good enough? What does this person think of me? Am I working out enough? What is God all about? Am I living my life the right way? Should I travel more? Should I be saving more money? *Insert hair pull and frustrated scream here* I have a few coping mechanisms to deal with this. I run, I write, I play with my dog... but the hampster wheel is always spinning. The single best way to calm the voices in my head is to help someone else. The reason is because when you are helping someone else, you are thinking about them and not yourself. My sponsor always told me that there is a difference between being selfish and being self-centered. Being self-centered means that everything is about you, which is why all my dizzying thoughts have to do with me. But when I am helping someone, I am quite literally thinking about them and not me. It is very therapeutic to help someone. As I said before, it can be a selfish act. When you help someone and watch them grow, it is an amazing feeling.

4 - They Have Faith

I don't really understand faith. I can conceptualize it, but how it works I don't know. I don't think I am supposed to. The strange paradox that somehow, when you believe something will happen, and you work towards it, that belief turns into a reality. I really think this guy says it best... I find that people in recovery have faith simply because it works for them. They have to believe in something larger than them because that was what it took for them to get sober in the first place. I grew up hating religion and anything related to religion. I grew up hating the fact that so many seemingly blind people put their energy into a lie. I'll admit parts of me still feels uneasy about it, but I see now what the foundation behind a belief system is. It is about belonging. It is about participating in something bigger than you. I find that to be very beautiful. I find that people in recovery have faith because they have experienced first hand what faith can do for them and their well-being. In Closing... As I said before, I have no intention of claiming that every recovered addict displays all of these character traits perfectly. Not even close. Some days I do well, some days I don't. The point I am trying to make is that I always try my best, and if you are reading this, you probably try your best too. The goal isn't to be perfect, the goal is to always be growing. Grow a little bit every day, and you will be just fine! Any other traits to add? Please leave them in the comments section below. :)